My Fresh Hell
Life in Scribbletown.

Samuel Clemens, I Presume?

2005-06-24
Guess what? I almost ran over Mark Twain this morning as I was pulling into the parking lot at work. He tried to fool me with the khaki shorts, the Birkenstocks and the bicycle, but there was no mistaking that bushy mustache and wild white hair, not to mention the bemused expression on his face. And I thought he was dead! What do I know?

So, I promised harri3tspy (link to the right) I’d write a book review and actually make use of my sad little B.A. in English (not to mention my incredibly useless Master’s in Teaching in Early Childhood Education) so I’ll try to write a couple of short reviews of books I’ve read this year. Something to look forward to next week, eh? I’ll pretend I didn’t hear your head hit the desk in boredom, Young Lady! Nobody’s making you read my journal. But believe me, this WILL be on the test.

But, first I’ll tell you all about my shopping extravaganza which is significant because 1) I’m not much of a shopper, b) I made out like a bandit, and 3) it was all FREE! Yes, I did pretty well in the gift certificate/money realm for my birthday this year. And I’m not even twelve! How awesome is that?!

First, I bought 3 CDs at a large online music and book emporium that starts with the letter A (it's a growing concern, I understand): “Hunky Dory” by David Bowie (because he totally rules my world and so does this album which, until it arrives, I only own on vinyl), “Mama’s Gun” by Erykah Badu, and “The Boy With The Arab Strap” by Belle and Sebastian.

Then, I went to Barnes & Noble and bought “Main Course Vegetarian Pleasures” by Jeanne Lemlin. I’ve got her “Quick Vegetarian Pleasures” and have used it to death. I’m glad I found something that just has main course recipes because I don’t make side dishes anymore unless its steamed broccoli or oven fries. Maybe mashed potatoes, but only when the potatoes are starting to sprout and I have to cook them all at once. (And freakass Dusty won’t even touch mashed potatoes. What’s wrong with that child?) It’s all one dish meals for us! I also got “Invincible Summer” by k.d.lang and “Wildflowers” by Tom Petty. So, that’s 5 CDs all told!

Then...THEN! I went to Hecht’s and took great advantage of their 1,000,000% off the lowest price sale and got 3 sleeveless clingy polyester/spandex tops in periwinkle blue, sandy taupe and red; a kicky little knee-length skirt of many swirlly colors; and a pair of ultra comfortable Capri pants (black) with an elastic waist. Because, I am, after all, incredible ancient now and I like elastic.

Man. That was almost actually fun. Especially the free part. You know what’s funny? It’s actually harder to buy stuff when you’re not spending any money. I'm even pickier. It’s like I want to be absolutely sure I’m getting something I really like and is absolutely perfect or I’ll feel like I wasted FREE MONEY and got ripped off. Sad but true. I don’t know what I’ll do when I win the mega millions lottery one day.

Okay. I need to do some work. Y’all have a good weekend! I’m going to do a little rain dance tomorrow morning seeing as how we haven’t had a drop in 22 days!! I have had to drag the hose around and actually water my vegetables and flowers and herbs! I don’t have time for this! Where is the rain?? Maybe I can place a work order for that. Lemme see what I can do...

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1:54 p.m. ::
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