My Fresh Hell
Life in Scribbletown.

Death and Taxes

2006-02-06

It was a fine and dandy weekend. Not too many hunters lurking in the woods waiting to kill innocent forest creatures (Run, Bambi, Run!). Wonder where they were? It was cold again yesterday after a torrential rain storm on Saturday. Dusty talked on and on about tornados for some reason.

I forced the kinders to go outside with me even though Dusty whined and wanted to play on the computer instead. No way! Let's get some fresh air! Have you learned nothing by reading The Secret Garden? What took the contrariness out of Mistress Mary? The wind of the moors! The being out of doors. All day long. Put color in her cheeks, fixed her appetite and her mood. Not to mention her snootiness. Not that's Dusty's snooty; that's not what I'm saying. She wouldn't know snooty from pa-tooty.

So let's get those coats on and beat it! Red's always ready to go outside. We even spied one of the barn cats – an orange fluffy one. Apparently there are still two living in the barn but they're skittish and don't show themselves much anymore.

Miao, miao! Said Red. She loves kitties.

We walked around peering down vole holes and at evidence left by the Official Freshhell Resident Groundhog (who, as far as I know, did not make any weather predictions last week. Of course, I was at work so what would I know? If a groundhog rises and nobody sees him, do we STILL have 6 more weeks of winter?). Someone's been scratching in my raised beds. Dusty tried to talk the bulbs into going back down into the ground. She's understands the weather's got them all confused. One snowdrop has fully emerged and the jasmine is blooming.

Dusty cracked herself up yesterday while working on random valentines for the universe, something she does year-round.

"Ha, ha! Mommy, guess what?"
"What?"
"I just burped AND farted! At the same time!"
She laughed again and tried to recreate the sounds for me. But, she was laughing too hard at the thought – burp AND fart! "Urp! Pffft!" "Aarp! Ppffftt!"

And, while everyone else in the world was getting comfortable in front of their televisions, peering over the mounds of snacks, guess what I was doing?

My taxes.

Yes, Miss Math Moron is the Tax Doer in the household. And, I do a pretty good job of it, if I do say so myself. Best of all, we get money back. Quite a tidy sum, I might add.

So, this afternoon I mailed them in – federal AND state.

And, when the checks come rolling in, I will be THIS much closer to getting a laptop of my very own. Any recommendations? I only need something that I can use for writing. And that doesn't suck. And won't self-destruct when the warranty runs out.

And, then…….we watched Bleak House. Not only was it Great Television but this episode featured my favorite phenomenon – Spontaneous Human Combustion! Sweet! I so love SHC. I mean, if you have to go, what better way? The coroner can just sweep you up into a jug and you're loved ones don't have to bother with the expense of embalming you, buying a coffin, all that stupid waste of money. Nope! Just a bag, a broom and a dust pan, and you're ready for….whatever comes next.

Assuming anything does.

I really couldn't say. I mean, I've seen Beyond and Back (Who hasn't? It's a classic!) but who really knows? Like the tagline says: Some will believe--others will not. DECIDE FOR YOURSELF!

Okay, that's all my smug little self (TAXES. COMPLETE.) has to say today. Be off with ye!

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3:35 p.m. ::
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